Recovery means healing & learning

Yesterday I talked to my Mom for the 1st time in a couple months. As usual, it didn't go well. First I was angry, then I felt like crying, & then for half an hour my eyes kept welling up with tears, & I thought to myself that eating would deaden those feelings, but I wasn't having a desire to binge. But that was just a thought, not a deep desire or need for food. I'd never had that happen before. I always either ignored the problem or I ate my feelings. This was progress. For the 1st time I felt feelings like a normal human being. For the first time I felt without needing to dump food into the emotion. This is progress. Sunday night I took my 3 babies to Hoots for a birthday party. I spent three entire hours chasing, jumping, & running with my babies. I had more fun than I can ever remember having. I couldn't have done that when I was 300 pounds. Recovery has not only helped me get in touch with my feelings, it's also helped me become a better father. Sunday night my 19 month old was teething. He was SO tired from a busy day of 2 church services, a lunch with another couple from church, & then the birthday party. But he was up until late last night teething & crying. I finally laid down on the couch with him on my chest & cuddled up under a blanket. He slept soundly the rest of the night. He was still in pain, but me holding & loving on him made him comforted enough to sleep through the pain. I enjoyed the bonding moment with him, & I realized that as much as I love my son & will always do everything I can to help relieve him of the pain he's going through, God loves me that much & more. And He's even more willing to help me through times that are painful or too much for me to bare on my own. All I have to do is ask God for help & He will. Just as I enjoyed helping my son in his time of need, God would find great fulfillment from helping me & having fellowship with me. Recovery isn't easy, but it heals physically, emotional, & spiritually. It can help better our relationships with our family, friends, co-workers, God, & even ourselves. I'm so happy. Thank you Jesus.